介绍： Season 4-16:The One With The Fake Party (Part 1)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, Chandler, Monica, and Phoebe are there. Phoebe is stressing out about something.]
Monica: What is it hon?
Phoebe: I-I can’t find anything that I want to eat! Everything I eat makes me nauseous! I’m telling...

介绍： Season 4-16:The One With The Fake Party (Part 1)
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, Chandler, Monica, and Phoebe are there. Phoebe is stressing out about something.]
Monica: What is it hon?
Phoebe: I-I can’t find anything that I want to eat! Everything I eat makes me nauseous! I’m telling you, being pregnant is no piece of cake—ooh! Cake!No.
Monica: Aww, honey I’m sorry.
Phoebe: God! Ooh! What is that smell? It’s coming from the bathroom. Ooh!
Chandler: Wow! Pregnancy does give you some weird cravings.
Joey: Yeah?
Phoebe: It’s me. It’s Phoebe. Listen there’s something in here I want to eat, what-what smells so good?
Joey: Is it the shampoo? It’s guava.
Phoebe: No!
Joey: Oh! Wait-wait! Is it my bologna sandwich?
Phoebe: Yes. Yes. Yes. I can’t believe it! The baby wants bologna! Maybe he wants me to eat meat? I can’t eat meat!
Joey: Oh, wait-wait! Maybe it’s a pickle?!
[Scene: Central Perk, Chandler, Monica, Joey and Rachel are there. Rachel is writing something on a pad, and then crumples it up and throws it on the floor.]
Chandler: What are you writing?
Rachel: Well, Joshua’s coming in tomorrow and since I don’t have the guts to ask him out, I’m going to sell him a coat and put this note in the pocket.
Chandler: Oh yeah? Joshua, give me a call sometime, guys like you never go out of style—what did you throw away?
Chandler: Hi guys!
All: Hey!
Joey: Hey, what have you guys been up too?
Ross: Oh, we went to see a collection of Victorian doorknobs at the Cupert-Hewitt museum.
Chandler: Without me?!
Emily: My uncle dragged us there. But, it actually it turned out to be really interesting.
Ross: Yeah.
Emily: They were so ornate and beautiful, I mean look at that!
Monica: I don’t know how museums work in England but, here, you’re not supposed to take stuff.
Emily: I uh, I got it from the gift shop. They have really lax security there.It’s a joke.
Ross: Bye.
Emily: Right, I’ve got to be off, I’ll see ya. Buh-bye then. Joey: Wow! You guys seem to be having a good time.
Ross: Oh yeah, she’s-she’s amazing. And-and she’s so much fun. And! Y’know what? When I’m with her, I’m fun! I even signed up for helicopter classes. She’s leaving in two days, I don’t have to do it.
Monica: Oh no, two days, you must be bummed.
Ross: Yeah, she’s got to go back to London. But you know what? I’ve been prepared for this from the start. We both knew we had two weeks together, and that’s it. Y’know.
Joey: Hey that’s what all my relationships are like.
Chandler: Yes, but in Ross’s case, they both know in two weeks that’s it.
Ross: Pheebs!
All: Hey!
Ross: Hello! Hello!
Phoebe: Yes! I know! I know! Yeah! So the baby is totally craving meat. This afternoon I tried tricking it, I made it a soy-burger to make it think it was getting meat, y’know? And I got nauseous.
Chandler: Maybe that’s because soy-burgers suck!
Phoebe: Being pregnant is tough on your tummy.
Joey: Hey, but at least you got that cool, pregnant lady glow.
Phoebe: That’s sweat. You throw up all morning, you’ll have that glow too.
[Scene: Bloomingdale’s, Rachel is preparing to slip Joshua the note.]
Joshua: Okay!
Rachel: Oh, here’s that trench-coat that you wanted.
Joshua: Oh great! Wow! Yeah, it’s comfortable.
Rachel: Yeah?
Joshua: Man, I could really flash somebody in this thing. Rachel: Oh no-no, no-no, they don’t want you to put your hands in the pockets until you are out of the store.
Joshua: Why not?!
Rachel: Well, that’s because of a lot of…
Joshua: Y’know, they ruin it for everybody.
Rachel: I know!
Joshua: Y’know, I wore that cashmere sweater on a date last night.
Rachel: Oh?
Joshua: Yeah, it was my first date since the uh, since the divorce.
Rachel: Well, congratulations, so do you love her?
Joshua: No, no, no, she’s nice but, y’know, it just it made me realize that I’m just not, I’m just not ready to be dating, y’know?
Rachel: Huh. Well, uh, that’s uh, that’s interesting.
Joshua: Hey-whoa-hey-hey, what was that?
Rachel: Oh, it’s just an anti-theft device.
Joshua: Then uh, what’s-what’s this?
Rachel: You need that, you need that too ‘cause obviously, a thief could just tear this up.
[Scene: Monica and Rachel's erm, Chandler and Joey's, Ross is writing on the Magna-Doodle as Rachel enters.]
Rachel: Oops, sorry. Listen, we-we have to have a party tonight! Actually, we have to have one in five minutes, so everybody cancel your plans.
Chandler: What are you talking about?
Joey: Yeah, what’ going on?
Rachel: We have to have a surprise Bon Voyage party for Emily. But it’s actually for Joshua.Look, he said he’s not ready to date, so I had to invite him to a party if I wanted to see him outside of work, and now I have the perfect opportunity to seduce him!
Ross: Well, as much as I’d like to meet Josh and warn him, Emily and I aren’t going to be here. All right? I mean, she’s going to come by first to say good-bye, and then I’ve got a whole special evening planned. So I’m sorry, no party.
Joey: Awwww!
Emily: Hello?
Rachel: Surprise!!!
Chandler and Joey: Surprise!!
Emily: No one’s ever thrown me a surprise party before!
Rachel: Well, it was all Ross’s idea.
Emily: You’re so sweet! And I’m so surprised!
Ross: You really didn’t know?
Chandler: Why are you in here if Joshua is all the way over there?
Rachel: Uhh, because I’m trying to play hard to get. Oh, quick he’s looking over here, say something funny.
Chandler: Like what?
Joey: What-what-what is so funny?
Chandler: I said, "Like what?"
Joey: Now that’s a thinker.
Rachel: Okay, y’know what, y’know what? This playing hard to get thing is not working. Umm, hand-hand me those cherries. Okay. Okay. Hi!
Joshua: Hi!
Rachel: Care for a cherry?
Joshua: Oh, no thanks.
Rachel: No? Y’know, I can tie one of these into a knot using just my tongue.
Joshua: You okay? You all right?
Ross: So we should probably get going soon.
Emily: Oh, but the party’s only just getting started!
Ross: Yeah, but we-we have to be at the Four Seasons for drinks in 15 minutes and then y’know, then The Plaza for dinner.
Emily: So why did you plan a party at the same time?
Ross: No-no-no, no, umm, actually American surprise parties are-are-are very short. It’s usually, "Surprise!" And then, "Oh my God, I’m so surprised—good-bye!"
Emily: But Ross, I’m such having a great time! Your sister has just been telling me that you used to dress up like little, old ladies and hold make-believe tea parties.
Ross: Monica said that did she?
Phoebe: Ooh, yeah. Then what are you going to put on top of that?
Joey: A little salami.
Phoebe: Ooh yeah! Then umm, what goes on top of the salami?
Joey: Pastrami.
Phoebe: Oooh, yeah. You’re a genius.
Rachel: Oh, could somebody give me a hand with this zipper?
Joey: Yeah.
Rachel: Up!
Monica: You changed?
Rachel: Yeah, I did. I needed my lucky dress.
Monica: And lucky means, more cleavage?
Chandler: Does for me.
Rachel: Ohh, God! Look at him, he’s so cute. I wanna go over there, grab him, and kiss him! How can I kiss him and not letting him know that I like him?
Joey: Oh! I know how you can get him, take off your bra.
Rachel: What?
Joey: There was a seen in Footloose...
Chandler: Flashdance.
Joey: Yeah-yeah, yeah, with that-that uh, plumber girl…
Chandler: She was a welder.
Joey: What? Were you like in the movie, or… Anyway, she takes off her bra under her shirt and pulls it out the sleeve. Very sexy, and classy.
Monica: Or if you want to kiss him, umm, you could use mistletoe.
Rachel: It’s not Christmas!
Monica: Or Spin the Bottle?
Rachel: He’s not 11!
Emily:Thank you so much for this. It was really so thoughtful of you.
Rachel: What? You’re leaving?!
Ross: Yes, we have something we have to get to.
Joshua: Uhh, yeah, I think I’m going to take-off too.
Rachel: No! You guys can’t leave yet! You have to stay, we-we got the whole big thing planned!
Ross: What big thing?
Rachel: So, Spin the Bottle works like this: I spin the bottle, it lands on Gunther, so I would have to kiss Gunther. All right. Who wants to go first?
Emily: I’ll go.
All: Yay!
Joey: Welcome to America.
Monica: Two in a row! You’ve got to use your tongues now! Rachel: Yay! Emily!
Chandler: What are the odds? What are the odds?
Ross: Okay, that-that’s enough! Y’know, let’s, let’s let someone else play.
Joey: If you didn’t want to play, why did you come to the party?
Rachel: Okay, my turn!!
Phoebe: Oh my God!! The baby just kicked!
All: Ohh!
Rachel: It’s okay! It’s okay! It kicked once, it’ll kick again!
All: Oh my God!
Rachel: All right, well, everybody just remember where they were sitting.
Rachel: Just a bug.
(To be continued)